Who Needs All That Pesky Guilt, Anyway?! - Tom & Ariana Sylvester

by | Jul 30, 2017 | Our Stories

I’ve struggled a LOT with guilt.

I feel guilty that get to work from home, and Tom’s still stuck in his 9-5.

I feel guilty that we accumulated so much debt over the years and didn’t have our shit together, that Tom HAS to be in his 9-5 still.

I feel guilty that I’m a mom, but that I don’t want to be with my kids 24/7.

I feel guilty that our house is a mess, and I hate cooking.

I feel guilty taking time to myself, because there is ALWAYS something on the to-do list I haven’t done –> see above

(P.S. I SUCK at personal care, also feel guilt for that.)

I feel guilty that I’m a wife, but we get virtually NO alone time together, and our relationship takes a back seat to the businesses & the kids.

When does it stop, right?!

 

The unfortunate thing about guilt though, it just keeps building.

Eventually, if you don’t take care of it, it will drag you down and trample you until you don’t remember who you are anymore.

I speak from experience.

Lucky for me, I have an amazing, understanding and very patient husband!

He knew something was wrong, and suggested I reach out for some help.

It’s the first time in my life I agreed to a call with a mindset coach.

We laughed, I cried, we laughed some more.

It’s one of the best investments I’ve made in my life since becoming an entrepreneur.

 

There 2 things from our call that stuck with me, that I’d like to share:

 

1. You have to put your own oxygen mask on before anyone else’s.

(cliche, I know. But a hard concept to accept sometimes!)

Who else feels like they have to be Superwoman (or man)?

I still have to drill this into my head at times:

Take care of me so I CAN take care of everyone else.

Take care of ME so I can take care of everyone else.

 

2. What are you “carrying” that you shouldn’t be?

All these things making me feel guilty, have underlying reasons.

Some of those reasons are not under my control or connected to me, and I need to let them go.

Only carry what is yours.

This one is forcing me to look at my control issues BIG time.

Only carry what is mine.

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If my sharing this helps even 1 person, then it was worth it.

This journey we’re on is hard, and more often than not it sucks big time.

One of my goals is to start sharing REAL stuff in the hopes that it makes someone’s journey suck just a little less